Notice from Microsoft:
*got the microsoft thing from a chain letter*
It has come to our attention that a few copies of the Lance Edition of Windows 98 may have accidentally been shipped outside of Mississippi.
If you have one of the Lance Editions you may need some help understanding the commands.
The Lance Edition may be recognized by looking at the opening screen. It reads WINDERS98 with a background picture of Toby superimposed on the Mississippi flag. It is shipped with a Garth Brooks screen saver.
Also note the Recycle Bin is labeled Outhouse.
My Computer is called This Infernal Contraption.
Dialup Networking is called Good Ol Boys.
Control Panel is known as the Dashboard.
Hard Drive is referred to as Wheel Drive.
Floppies are Them Little Ol' Plastic Disc Thangs.
Other features: Instead of an Error Message you get a Winder covered with a garbage bag and duct tape.
OK = ats aww-right.
Cancel = hail no.
Reset = aw shoot.
Yes = shore.
No = Naaaa.
Find = hunt-fer it.
Go to = over yonder.
Back = back yonder.
Help = hep me out here.
Stop = ternit off.
Start = crank it up.
Programs = stuff that does stuff.
Documents = stuff I done done.
Also note that Winders 98 does not recognize capital letters or punctuation marks. We regret any inconvenience it may have caused if you received a copy of the Lance Edition. You may return it to Microsoft for a replacement version.